My Facebook status update for my holiday with the family on our farm:
Dearest Lovely Friends!
This holiday season I will be revelling in the peace and quiet amongst the woodland creatures that is THE FARM. I would love to see you & visit, but if you show up unannounced/ feel as though it is appropriate to drop by without calling us first, I will personally chase you down the driveway with an aluminium bat, taking out every damn light on your vehicle. Also, I will hate you forever. And ever. And ever. So just call. And if we don’t answer, TAKE THE HINT.
Love always,
jei
[My family has this horrible habit of being terribly friendly and acquiring far too many loving folk around them. In true country-style, everyone drops by without notice. Most seasons, this is absolutely delightful. During the holidays, however, our front door appears to become a revolving door, and we end up getting virtually zero time together, as just a family. When I myself visit The Farm (which is not often) there are always three people living in institutions who I absolutely must take the time to see. Everyone else is secondary. With only a few days to get it all in, I decided this Facebook status was the best way to send my message without folk misunderstanding me. I’m not sure I achieved that goal, but at least the fuckers will call before dropping in this year.]
